HowTo:Move a Mountain

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  1. Aquire a large amount of faith. Watching a politician be struck by lightning ought to to it.
  2. If you do not live near mountains, wait for them to come to you. Under no circumstances should you go to the mountain! That would show lack of belief.
  3. Once a mountain comes, simply will it away. If your faith is pure and strong, it will hurl its self into the sea, even if you live in Arkansas.
  4. If that does not work, remember why the Good Lord gave us dynamite.
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